I’m an ICU nurse and I’m so very tired and burned out from the last 9 months. Thank you for your words. It will make going back into work tomorrow a little easier.
It’s been a year of tears. This week, I’ve been shedding tears of relief as my former nursing coworkers are being vaccinated. I see you, I know you, & my heart is with you💜
sending you the text i just wrote to my best friend after reading your first dear sugar letter of 2020:
'well, wouldn't you know i'm writing you again today with fresh tears drying on my face.. i opened my email and found my first dear sugar letter in my inbox,
since cheryl strayed recently reinstated her column via her newsletter subscription.
by the second or third sentence, even tho she was writing about a janitor job she had during high school, i was just so happy and relieved to be reading her words and hearing her voice fresh on the page again i started crying😂
she is so f*#king inspiring. . .
the way she writes that pierces through our inferiorities and straight to the heart.. in the way she conveys the essence of what so many of us are feeling at a given time, or place.
if you subscribed, yay for both of us :) if you didn't, she says we can forward a letter once in a while even though it's a paid subscription💕
I couldn't love this more! I'm SO glad you're writing Dear Sugar again. I think your Dear Sugar essays are your best work and I still gift Tiny Beautiful Things more than any other book. Thanks, Sugar!
In pre-COVID days, I had a gym membership. One of the employees was a man with developmental disabilities, but also with the widest smile and the most cheerful greeting for everyone. All day long he would be emptying trash, cleaning surfaces, sweeping, and making the gym a tidy and pleasant place. One day I heard him talking to another member: "Someone asked me, don't you get tired of cleaning everything when people just come along behind you and mess it up again?" Then - with that wide, wide smile - "I said no! Because that means I get to come back tomorrow and do this again!"
Sugar, neither you nor Despairing want people to undo your hard work. But turn the perspective around and it means purpose. There is meaningful, ongoing work to be done - and our calling is not to *finish* the work, but to *do* the work.
Oh, thank god. Sugar is back, and based on the choice for first-out-of-the-gate, I am not alone in my current state of despair. Thank you, Despairing, and thank you, Sugar. I’ve missed you. Love, love, love.
"The truest story is always the widest one. It’s the one that folds in the highs alongside the lows, the losses alongside the gains. It looks forward and back. It runs in a jagged line rather than straight. It tells us we must go on, even when going on seems impossible.
You have the tools to make it beautiful again. Go."
Beautiful, Cheryl! Thank you for the insight and wisdom. As I read this, a very visual picture of the movie, Gandhi came to mind. In the non-violent struggle for Independence of my country, India, line after line of my countrymen were hit by the British, but just as one row of people reeled and fell, the next row came up... to be met with the same brutal fate. But they kept coming, line after line of ocean waves of people. In the end, the occupying British tired their hands out hitting with batons and they stopped. In Gita it is said, you have the ownership of your efforts, not its fruit. The only thing that we can do, is to keep doing.
Oh, Cheryl! So glad to have you back as Sugar. Your thoughtful, careful, truly masterful work connecting to people in this way has been such a huge inspiration to me. It moved me to start my own weekly advice column on Medium, and I am a day late reading this because I was working on it. But now it's done (will go up at noon, as it does every Wednesday) and I can take the time to read this and remember why I started in the first place. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
So grateful for your writing. Thank you. I’m going to share some excerpts for my department virtually this Friday. I work for an environmental non profit and damn it’s been a hard, really hard 4 years. We made it through but feels like we left carnage on the field that will take a long time to heal from. Your encouragement and acknowledgment of the journey helps. #grateful
Cheryl, thank you so much for these words! I believe so many of us connected with this letter. Especially around the mix of emotions of this election - Biden winning, but not winning by the landslide we wanted. As well as seeing how many voters did vote for Trump, agreeing/ignoring his hatred towards others. But, I love how you phrased that Kamala Harris can be where she is now due to the hard work done on Hillary's campaign. I'm definitely finding my motivation again through this letter!
Thank you for choosing this letter; it speaks to how so many of us are feeling right now. I know for me, the election was another dark reminder of how my values and the values of my friends/family/co-workers are simply not shared by such a large portion of our country. My liberal bubble is cozy but not a reflection of the country as a whole. It's easy to feel despair, but your response is a reminder that we can't let that immobilize us. I am so grateful to you for bringing Sugar back and looking forward to your thoughtful and healing words in my inbox every month!
So wonderful to read your words of hope and perseverance and pushing forward! I needed that pep talk. All it takes a little encouragement for me, and a little reminder that we’re all going through the same stuff in one way or another. Thank you! 🙏
this is so much what i needed to hear right now. i feel that we're in this for a long haul, and that there is plenty of nasty ahead that will make things (unnecessarily?) hard for everyone, but your words give me something to return to for hope, for a reason to keep pushing into that bluster and unpleasantness. thank you thank you!
Perfection. The loveliness of your response...the feeling of sanding the FUCKs off and watching them reappear. Knowing they will. And that it still matters. The quiet hopefulness in your words. Sugar is baaaccckk.
Thank you all for these wonderful comments! I'm so touched.
you are a bright bonding glue for our broken pieces... love!
I’m an ICU nurse and I’m so very tired and burned out from the last 9 months. Thank you for your words. It will make going back into work tomorrow a little easier.
I can't imaging how very exhausted you are right now. Thank you for your dedicated service.
It’s been a year of tears. This week, I’ve been shedding tears of relief as my former nursing coworkers are being vaccinated. I see you, I know you, & my heart is with you💜
Thank you so much for your hard work. It is so very much appreciated.
sending you the text i just wrote to my best friend after reading your first dear sugar letter of 2020:
'well, wouldn't you know i'm writing you again today with fresh tears drying on my face.. i opened my email and found my first dear sugar letter in my inbox,
since cheryl strayed recently reinstated her column via her newsletter subscription.
by the second or third sentence, even tho she was writing about a janitor job she had during high school, i was just so happy and relieved to be reading her words and hearing her voice fresh on the page again i started crying😂
she is so f*#king inspiring. . .
the way she writes that pierces through our inferiorities and straight to the heart.. in the way she conveys the essence of what so many of us are feeling at a given time, or place.
if you subscribed, yay for both of us :) if you didn't, she says we can forward a letter once in a while even though it's a paid subscription💕
thank you sugar♥️❤️♥️💗❤️♥️
Thank you, Heather! And please tell your friend that I'm happy to add him/her/they to the list for no charge if the cost is too much.
I couldn't love this more! I'm SO glad you're writing Dear Sugar again. I think your Dear Sugar essays are your best work and I still gift Tiny Beautiful Things more than any other book. Thanks, Sugar!
Thanks, Deidre! I so appreciate your kindness.
In pre-COVID days, I had a gym membership. One of the employees was a man with developmental disabilities, but also with the widest smile and the most cheerful greeting for everyone. All day long he would be emptying trash, cleaning surfaces, sweeping, and making the gym a tidy and pleasant place. One day I heard him talking to another member: "Someone asked me, don't you get tired of cleaning everything when people just come along behind you and mess it up again?" Then - with that wide, wide smile - "I said no! Because that means I get to come back tomorrow and do this again!"
Sugar, neither you nor Despairing want people to undo your hard work. But turn the perspective around and it means purpose. There is meaningful, ongoing work to be done - and our calling is not to *finish* the work, but to *do* the work.
Oh, thank god. Sugar is back, and based on the choice for first-out-of-the-gate, I am not alone in my current state of despair. Thank you, Despairing, and thank you, Sugar. I’ve missed you. Love, love, love.
"The truest story is always the widest one. It’s the one that folds in the highs alongside the lows, the losses alongside the gains. It looks forward and back. It runs in a jagged line rather than straight. It tells us we must go on, even when going on seems impossible.
You have the tools to make it beautiful again. Go."
ALL THE FUCK YESSSSES.
Beautiful, Cheryl! Thank you for the insight and wisdom. As I read this, a very visual picture of the movie, Gandhi came to mind. In the non-violent struggle for Independence of my country, India, line after line of my countrymen were hit by the British, but just as one row of people reeled and fell, the next row came up... to be met with the same brutal fate. But they kept coming, line after line of ocean waves of people. In the end, the occupying British tired their hands out hitting with batons and they stopped. In Gita it is said, you have the ownership of your efforts, not its fruit. The only thing that we can do, is to keep doing.
Oh, Cheryl! So glad to have you back as Sugar. Your thoughtful, careful, truly masterful work connecting to people in this way has been such a huge inspiration to me. It moved me to start my own weekly advice column on Medium, and I am a day late reading this because I was working on it. But now it's done (will go up at noon, as it does every Wednesday) and I can take the time to read this and remember why I started in the first place. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
This is one that I wrote a few weeks ago, which I'm very proud of. I was holding the inspiration you offer close to my heart that day, for sure. https://medium.com/@ashasanaker_10248/walk-with-me-17-the-world-will-break-you-open-7c5431862c54
"What if despair is my companion rather than my adversary?" What a treat to sit down and read your words. Thank you for your clarity & insight!
So grateful for your writing. Thank you. I’m going to share some excerpts for my department virtually this Friday. I work for an environmental non profit and damn it’s been a hard, really hard 4 years. We made it through but feels like we left carnage on the field that will take a long time to heal from. Your encouragement and acknowledgment of the journey helps. #grateful
Cheryl, thank you so much for these words! I believe so many of us connected with this letter. Especially around the mix of emotions of this election - Biden winning, but not winning by the landslide we wanted. As well as seeing how many voters did vote for Trump, agreeing/ignoring his hatred towards others. But, I love how you phrased that Kamala Harris can be where she is now due to the hard work done on Hillary's campaign. I'm definitely finding my motivation again through this letter!
Keep going, Despairing!
Thank you for choosing this letter; it speaks to how so many of us are feeling right now. I know for me, the election was another dark reminder of how my values and the values of my friends/family/co-workers are simply not shared by such a large portion of our country. My liberal bubble is cozy but not a reflection of the country as a whole. It's easy to feel despair, but your response is a reminder that we can't let that immobilize us. I am so grateful to you for bringing Sugar back and looking forward to your thoughtful and healing words in my inbox every month!
So wonderful to read your words of hope and perseverance and pushing forward! I needed that pep talk. All it takes a little encouragement for me, and a little reminder that we’re all going through the same stuff in one way or another. Thank you! 🙏
this is so much what i needed to hear right now. i feel that we're in this for a long haul, and that there is plenty of nasty ahead that will make things (unnecessarily?) hard for everyone, but your words give me something to return to for hope, for a reason to keep pushing into that bluster and unpleasantness. thank you thank you!
Perfection. The loveliness of your response...the feeling of sanding the FUCKs off and watching them reappear. Knowing they will. And that it still matters. The quiet hopefulness in your words. Sugar is baaaccckk.
Thanks, Sarah! xx